10 Recipes For Creating a Happy Home

The coming together of two individuals of opposite sex and sometimes opposite personality in marriage is the starting point of a home. As soon as a man and a woman agree between themselves  to come together and lawfully share each other for the rest of their lives, a new home is made. And most times new couples get marriage wishes like;

“May your married life be filled with happiness, joy and never-ending love? Have a happy married life” - Anonymous

Virtually every newly married couple get such good will message as above; a happy and joyful married life. But do most couples find happiness and joy afterwards? Your guess is as good as mine.  

Some couples end up enduring married life instead of enjoying the companionship and love of their partner. 

Not having the opportunity to appreciate the challenges that come with married life or having a negative experience growing up in a family are some of the sources of disaffection between couples and this do lead to an unhappy home. But whichever is the case, there are fundamental things couples must pay attention to in other to create a happy and loving family.

Here are 10 basic recipes that can help a couple create a happy family and a joyful home.

 1. Be a companion to your spouse

2. Agree to Have a Happy Home

3. Discuss Parenting Plan in advance with your Spouse

4. Both Spouses must get involved in Parenting of Kids

5. Make time to understand, appreciate and manage children's idiosyncrasy

6. Your Marriage Relationship first before the Children

7.  Have Family Counsel session weekly

8. Play Together

9.  Be a success in the way u leave as a parent

10. Pray Together

   

      1. Be a True Companion to your spouse.

One of the basic essences of marriage is companionship. A companion is defined as each of a pair of things intended to complement or match each other.

It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.  Genesis 2: 18

To be a companion in marriage means you guys must be friends, a companion is one who journeys with you. And Marriage is meant to be a journey of a life time. 

Therefore, couples must make conscious effort to accompany each other in all things. A happy home starts with a happy couple that finds companionship and friendship in each other. A couple that enjoys each other!

 2. Agree To Have a Happy Home

Couples need to sincerely sit and agree to build a home sustained by joy and happiness. It is just like setting any other goal in life. This helps the marriage to have a focus rather than wishing your home is as happy as your neighbours or parents. Happy Families are not accidents. 

It involves saying to your selves that no matter the challenges you face, including times you quarrel, that each of you will remember your vision for your home and come together again and reconcile. This does guide your actions even outside your home such that even before you do anything, you will first weigh the impact of your action on the joy of your home. Over time it will be stamped into your subconscious  such that every thing you do as a family will gear towards a happy home.

      

      3. Discuss Parenting Plan In Advance.

According to Wikipedia, Parenting is defined as the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, financial, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood.

Therefore, the contribution of a father and a mother to the total development of a child is very important. It then means is that parenting is a project that must be planned for. Like in every other project in life, if couples fail to plan their parenting approach and agree on how to handle certain aspects of their children’s life, there will be a disconnect and that might lead to a confused home. 

For instance, won’t it be confusing if couples fail to agree on how many kids they hope to have. You might need to even agree on the kind of dressing you will allow in your home. This will engender understanding and remove unnecessary rancor that creates problem in the family.

Also most parenting disagreements also hinge on how and when to discipline the children, if you agree ahead of time on discipline, you will kind of have a united front and the children will not be able to play one parent against the other.

      4. Both Spouses Must Get Involved In Parenting of Their Children.

I am very sure most of us have come across two parents accusing each other for the misbehaviour of their children. It is either the mother was too busy or too protective or the father was insensitive and never around to have an influence over the child. And this eventually creates an unhappy family.

When both parents get involved in the act of bringing up the young one, there is this subconscious safety that envelops the child. He or she tends to grow up with much confidence and trust. This happens because the real presence of a father figure instills discipline and confidence in a growing child and the tender presence of a caring mother instills love. All these add up to create a home filled with joy and respect.

      5. Make out Time to Understand, Appreciate And Manage Children’s Idiosyncrasy

Effective parenting is the bed rock of a happy family. Understanding the thinking of children and how they approach their activities goes a long way in establishing a good connection between you and your kids. One thing parents should understand is that children do not reason like adults;

• They will do weird things. It is good to let them be weird sometimes, as long as it does not hurt them or destroy their outlook on life.
• They will do foolish things, it is your duty as a father or mother to teach them wisdom
• Children model the behavior that they see rather than what you tell them to do. So do not expect more from your children than you are ready to demonstrate and live yourself
•  Children always do things for a reason. I remember watching my second daughter cry sometimes. I noticed that as soon as she gets what she want, the tears will dry up in seconds and she is full of smile. I termed her style of cry a “purposeful cry” Sometimes they want to misbehave on purpose; it is your duty to draw the line while trying not to limit their “free expression” tendencies.
•  They are fun to be with. Both parents should find time to enjoy together the funny and innocent presence of their kids. Some of their idiosyncrasies do add laughter and fun even when their parents seem to be having friction.

When parents do well to understand the kids, the children do have a sense of ownership and always get excited at the sight of their parents; the home is filled with warmth and happiness

     6. Your Marriage Relationship First Before The Children

      

Many couples mistakenly believe that if the children are happy, then the family will be happy. This is an erroneous thinking , because most times what you have is a family that looks outwardly happy but at the home front everyone is on their own track. And this is not the definition of a happy home.

     In reality, if parents focus on making the children happy, they will neglect making each other happy and that can cause disaffection in the relationship. But if they strive to make each other happy by having a loving and strong relationship, the children will see that bond and relationship in their parents. This helps the child to learn how to love and makes him or her more secure and happy.

      7. Have Family Counsel Session Weekly

Family counsel session avails parents the opportunity to discuss collective and individual challenges. And when an individual’s problem is treated as a family problem, there is always a strong bond between the parents and the children. And it is easier for parents to understand their children better if they make out time to listen to them and share their views.

       8. Play Together

Playing together as a family, whether among couples or together with the kids, is a magical way to build connection among the members of the family. It brings the family into sync, heals bad moods and minor relationship stress and creates a happy feeling in the home. 

Something great happens to families when they play together: Everyone lightens up and there is communication. Therefore, every family need times together in other to build lifelong memories and to play together! Playing together is an essential ingredient for a happy and healthy family!

 9. Be A Success in the way you live as a Parent

"What we demand from our children, we must demand of ourselves. There must be a standard by which we live - and, as parents, we must set it and live it." -- Jim Rohn

Modeling appropriate behavior and attitude in relationships is the best way to teach children how best to relate in the home or within the community. The best success tool a parent can give their children is maintaining a strong and happy relationship in the marriage and by showing strong desire live an exemplary life. 

       10.Pray Together.

Praying together unites families under a banner of common goals.  When you pray together as a family, each member of the family learns what it means to be intimate with God. Also during family prayer, members pray for and hear others concerns. This engenders deep connection among members of the family.

Children need to see genuine faith acted out in the lives of their parents and this can best be done by praying together.  Praying together is one of the most critical things you can do to pass your convictions on to the next generation.

Praying together helps families align their will with our Heavenly Father’s, resulting in blessings of strength, comfort, and inspiration that enable the family to experience love and happiness.